From Ohio stage dreams to the therapist’s chair
I often find myself thinking about this statement when I’m sitting across from a client in my office at Stepping Stone: My life and challenges brought me to where I am today. As a clinical therapist, I’m reminded that every person who sits across from me has a story, a history, and a set of experiences that have shaped who they are. My ability to connect with people comes from a place that has been with me for as long as I can remember. I’ve always considered myself an empath, someone who values human connection, understanding, and the ability to see people unconditionally.
When I think about where this part of me began, I picture a young gay boy growing up in a small town in Ohio, looking out his bedroom window and wanting something more. Feeling somewhat different than those around me, I knew there was a bigger world out there, and I wanted to experience it. That desire eventually led me to pursue a dream of becoming an actor and attending college. I became the first person in my Midwestern family to go to college, not to mention choosing theatre as my path. Looking back, I realize that acting gave me more than an education in performance. It gave me a deeper understanding of human behavior, emotion, and expression. It allowed me to explore different perspectives and understand that everyone has a story behind what they show the world.
After college, I moved to New York City to act on the Broadway stage. I experienced the beauty and excitement of theatre, along with the grit and challenges of city life. I learned that where there is happiness, there can also be sadness, and where there is success, there are often defeats. At some point, the struggles I was facing began to outweigh the dreams I had worked so hard to pursue. I found myself lost and struggling with addiction. The life I had imagined for myself looked very different from the reality I was living.
What helped me find my way was the love of friends, the support of others, and a sense of compassion that, in time, I learned to extend toward myself. My journey wasn’t about becoming someone entirely different. It was about learning to accept myself, understand my experiences, and find meaning in the things I had been through. Over time, I began turning my chaos into self-love and discovered a desire to give back to others.
That desire led me into behavioral therapy, where I worked with children on the autism spectrum. I found fulfillment in connecting with this population, who generally struggle with connections to others. I began to understand their needs, embracing our differences and supporting their growth. In time, life brought me to San Diego, where I continued developing my identity as a mental health professional. All of these experiences, including the difficult ones, helped shape the clinician I am today.
Now, when I sit across from a client at Stepping Stone, I carry those experiences with me. I understand that people are more than their addiction, their struggles, or the circumstances that brought them into treatment. I know what it feels like to lose your way, to question yourself, and to try to find a path forward. I also know that growth is possible when we are met with compassion, understanding, and acceptance.
I don’t sit across from my clients believing I have all the answers. Instead, I try to meet them where they are and offer a space where they can be themselves without judgment. My own experiences have taught me the importance of being seen, heard, and accepted.
"I don’t sit across from my clients believing I have all the answers."
— Tim
So yes, my life and challenges brought me to where I am today. I find meaning in that statement because it reminds me that even the hardest parts of our lives can become part of something meaningful. As I remember that gay boy staring out the window, I could not have imagined his journey and where it would take him. Today, I have the privilege of sitting across from another human being and accepting them for who they are, in part because I have spent years learning to do the same for myself.